You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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