Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize