I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
