I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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