And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
