Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
