i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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