I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize