did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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