I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
