i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
