dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
