Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
