am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
