She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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