Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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