Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
