girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
