I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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