Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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