omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize