soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
The adults are the big ones right?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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