im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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