Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
