Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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