Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
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He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
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direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize