I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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