Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
