tell your sister to shave her snatch
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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