I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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