Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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