Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
