i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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