She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
