Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
