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• (716): View more from New York

  speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms

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• (415): View more from California

  Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.

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• (805): View more from California

  I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.

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• 

  25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  can i bring anything?

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  is there a theme i should know about?

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• 

  These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.

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• (818): View more from California

  I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse

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