There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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