Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
