wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
