apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
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