Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
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