The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
