Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
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