no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize