Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Non-Jews are for practice
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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