I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize
