I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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