I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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