Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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