well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
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