And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
